The Musician

So there’s this guy, right? He’s a musician. You know him from open mics, and other gigs he does around town. He’s impossibly talented, and the most charming person you’ve ever witnessed. He’s gorgeous – but not in a “I try so hard on my look” kind of way, but sort of accidentally. Let’s call it a happy little accident.

He’s got thousands of Facebook friends, but he keeps his circle quite small. Somehow, you managed to sneak your way into it, though. He takes on the burden of so many people’s bullshit, but he gives none of his own to anyone. He’s a healer, and all you want to do is love him.

When you met him last year, it was like your whole world changed. It was like he ignited something in you that hadn’t been alive for a while. Something spiritual.

As you started to get to know him more, you start feeling his energy more and more. To the point that when you are around him, you don’t really know if you are feeling your own emotions or if you are embodying him. To you, it feels like a Twin Flame connection. And let’s be honest, you only know what that word means because in trying to sort out this super spiritual man, you got lost – and I mean WAY LOST – in a spiritual journey. Not that that’s a bad thing, of course. It seems to have brought you peace.

You and the Musician have experienced so much of the same, yet you two are completely different beings.

He’s a musician – a magician – he hypnotizes you. He wraps you up in the “why’d he do that?”, “why isn’t he talking to me?”, “what’s going on?”. And if you were to ask him, he’d just tell you it’s because he feels everything. He sees everything. And if he’s not using words, you just need to listen closer.

He’s always there – or at least he says he is. If he’s in your dreams, your mind, it’s because he’s there energetically.

You love him. And you convince yourself that he loves you too – but does he? He barely talks to you when you’re out, and there are a whole cult of women vying for his attention. But, if he’s as connected to you as he’s convinced you that he is, then of course he isn’t talking to you as much as you think he should be. Because you too can feel. You too can understand him without words.

Then you get him alone. You meet him for coffee. Just you and him. You are there for hours – staring into each other’s eyes, talking about the universe. He sees you, like you’ve never let anyone see you before. He says he’s seen this meeting before, but he won’t tell you the outcome. The Musician always likes to keep you guessing.

Nothing happens that night. Physically anyway. But, everything happens all at the same time. You feel rocked – just like the first time you met him, the world changes again.

Then a couple nights later, you are out with the group. And you fight – the Musician is drunk and he is lashing out at you for things you had no part of. And sure, you’re a little a dramatic about it. The fight continues until he stops messaging back the next day. A week later, and he’s still not accepting your attempts at extending an olive branch.

You spiral. You are devastated. The person who you just let see your soul has turned on you.

Don’t worry. In a month you’ll still be wondering what the fuck happened that night. You’re going to write stories, poems… shit, you’ll learn how to read tarot cards just in hopes that you’ll get some sort of answer.

You don’t get one. Or, at least you don’t think you do.

You eventually start being civil again in real life. Keeping in mind that all you ever wanted to do was love this man, and now he hardly even looks at you. It’s hard, but the love doesn’t seem to go away.

Your thoughts of him do eventually lessen, and he stops being in your dreams as much – if he’s as energetically connected to you as you believe he is, boy was he thinking about you a lot too. But, even though he’s farther away now, you feel the need to do one more tarot reading on the connection between the two of you.

The cards all point to there being a sudden realization on his part, and that a romantic situation that he was in would turn out badly.

You brush all that off, because as far as you know he’s not seeing anyone. It must just be a bad reading (you are no expert, after all).

Now, you all are at a bar one night. He’s there with his friends, and you with yours. It’s a small town bar – everyone knows everyone. There’s this guy – let’s call him John Mellencamp (save that explanation for another story) – and he’s talking you up all night. He is so cute, and just the sweetest. He’s a great guy, and your mutual friends can vouch for him.

You see the Musician eyeing the situation up – he’s not doing anything about it of course. But John Mellencamp is drunk in love, and you’ve got the butterflies. Do you give a shit about the Musician tonight? Absolutely not. It’s all going so well. Before you leave, you add John Mellencamp to Facebook, and you both are excited to see where things go.

When you go to leave, you see the Musician. He is not saying a word, but he’s looking into your eyes. You feel him. He’s jealous. He isn’t happy about you giving your attention elsewhere. But you know who doesn’t care? You, bitch. Because did you see the guy you were talking to all night? It’s all over for the Musician.

Or is it?

Because, here you sit a week later. John Mellencamp hasn’t accepted that friend request, and you start to wonder if it was all just a drunk flirt. And as it turns out, the Musician did have another girl after all.

A girl who he just had a falling out with, and he no longer was interested in.

Just like the cards said.

To be continued?

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